Just like old times....

Cindy:

A few months ago I believe at the beginning of March, one morning that mom was feeling good she had decided she would come to school with me to pre-register Noah for kindergarten.  That day was so full of so many different emotions for the three of us. Mom was feeling a little anxious because she hadn't seen any of her co-workers since she'd been diagnosed and didn't know how they'd react when they saw the significant weight loss she'd had and how much she'd aged over the past year.  Noah was super excited to play with kids all day long and finally get to ride the big yellow school bus with his brother and sister, just counting the days until school starts. And all I felt was sad, sad not knowing if mom would make it to see his first day of kindergarten.  Watching her walk him around so proudly from teacher to teacher to introduce her favorite grandchild Noah, had me fighting back the tears. In the 5 years that my little Noah's been alive my mom has spent every single moment with him from the day she watched him be born until the day she leaves this earth the bond that they've created in this short time is unbreakable. And as sad as I know we'll all be when she dies Noah will probably be affected the most.  Ever since he could talk Noah's always called her Mama and me mommy. And up until last year he used to sneak out of his room after everyone fell asleep to sleep in her room because she would tell him stories and make the two of them pancakes in the middle of the night and watch Law & Order until he fell asleep. But as she began getting sick more frequently I tried breaking him of the habit by telling him he was getting to big to sleep with mama who wasn't feeing good enough to have company.  For a few weeks I thought I'd convinced him but then I came to realize that Noah was still sneaking down every night but now he would wake up early in the morning and tiptoe back to his room.

Well the point of the story is mom had decided the day we registered him for school which one of the three kindergarten teachers she wanted to be his, so there's Ms.T who's young, bubbly and sweet, Ms.S who's a constant screamer and doesn't help the kids open their hot lunches, so sometimes they go without eating, and then there Mrs. P who always has a smile on her face and loves to dote on the kids and all of the little kids love. 

Mom felt Mrs.P would be the best fit for Noah because she's the one who would be the kindest and most understanding to Noah when she died if she died while he was still in kinder. So she walked up to the superintendent who is also a close friend of hers and asked if he could grant a dying woman this last wish and he agreed. So every year the Friday before classes begin at 4pm sharp the class lists are posted at the front doors of the school letting excited students know who there teacher will be for the year.  My kids woke up Friday with only one thing on the brain "Can we go to school and find out who our teachers are?" "Sure" I replied "We'll go at 4 since it's only 6 in the morning. "Is it 4 yet?" My mom asked. 

At 4 o'clock we took the 5 minute ride to the school I laughed when my mom jumped out of the car like a school kid and ran over to the door with all of the other kids racing to find out who would be their teachers. 

The minute she turned around I could tell Noah hadn't gotten the teacher she wanted for him instead he'd gotten the screamer and for the first time in months I saw old mom the one that when she got angry you didn't want to mess with.  The problem was there was know one to talk to because the school was already closed. Mom spent the entire weekend upset and said she would go to school first thing monday morning and get this taken care of. I told her to let it go but she insisted I honestly didn't think she would go but early this morning she was up and dressed she even put on makeup.  We waited for her nurse to come and draw her labs and headed over to the school the minute she was done. Knowing how angry mom was I chose to stay in the car while she went in to talk to the superintendent. I almost felt like a kid again letting mom go and take care of any mess we got into. Fifteen minutes later mom walked out of the school with the hugest smile on her face I'd seen in quite a while. She said "there you go it's all taken care of" and just like when we were kids she became Noah's hero and mine all over again.  So we came home and I fell asleep with Ellie just to be woken up to mom cooking, something she hasn't done since Christmas, the oh so familiar smells filling the whole house, while joking and laughing with the kids and for a couple of hours for the first time, in a long time, I forgot she was sick and dying and realized really just how much I missed the good old days....

May 21,2014

Wednesday 

Flash Foward 10 months later...

It's amazing how the first day of school seems so long ago. I remember feeling devastated at the possibility my mom wouldn't be around to see my son on his

first day of kindergarten. 

Well here they are at Noah's graduation with their favorite teacher.

If even just for today I'm feeling like, Life is beautiful, sweet and full of unforeseen blessings.

 If anyone had told me a year ago this is where we'd be on this day, I may not have believed them, but it just goes to show Anything is Possible;-)