February 1, 2014
Mom slept right through taking her meds this morning. When she finally woke up the first word's out of her month were "thanks for letting me sleep, I feel Great almost like I don't have cancer!"
I was like Awesome!
While inwardly thinking "What are you talking about I always let you sleep, it's like narcolepticpolooza over here".:-)
I asked her if she wanted oatmeal for breakfast and right away she asked if I was crazy. Dare I ask why exactly would it be crazy to eat oatmeal for breakfast. She explained because she was having a ct on the 17th.
I said " You do know that's 3 weeks away right?" She said "It may be 3 weeks away, but I'm still not completely convinced that what the doctors saw in my stomach and thought was cancer wasn't just the oatmeal I'd had the day prior to the procedure when they finally diagnosed me.
"Mom, is what your saying that the doctors don't know the difference between oatmeal and tumors? And you don't really think you have cancer?"
"No Cindyyyyyy... I haven't completely jumped on the crazy train yet.. It's just on days like these "No cancer kind of days, I like to imagine everyone's been wrong and I'm the only one right, as usual.
Because how can I be dying, yet feel so great?"
She felt so great, she walked around the house holding the baby's hand while Ellie showed her how she's mastered the art of walking, the two of them taking a small break to sit by the window and watch the snow come down. 
Just to pick up where they left off, followed by a 30 minute pillow fight with the boys, and her making chicken soup which she ended up eating way to much of.
I'd like to tell you the feeling lasted..
She hung out with all of us until she started throwing up again this afternoon. I'm unsure if it's because she over ate today or for some other reason I refuse to think about. I ended up giving her 2 liters of saline just to make sure she stayed somewhat hydrated.
Everytime I see her throw up I can't help but cringe on the inside at how miserable it must be for her to have what feels like a never ending stomach flu.
I just think how whenever I get the flu, and feel all clammy and miserable all I want to do is lay on the cold tile floor until the feeling passes, with the comfort of knowing that soon there will be an end in sight.
Some days she hides her frustration in all of it so well and some days it rises right up to the surface. On those particular days, hugs and kisses are always free flowing, unlimited and showered on her from the smallest baby in the house to the biggest one.
By 3 this morning we were finally able to get it all under control and she finally got some sleep. When she finally woke up this morning the first thing that came out of her mouth was " It feels like one of those No cancer kind of days again"....
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